15YO's bad attitude
Hello,
I have a teenage boy, almost 15 years old. He has been acting so badly and I don't know how to deal with his bad attitude. He barely speaks to us. He is always in a bad mood. He does not want to do anything with us, not even sit down to have dinner. I don't know what to do.... I am hating spending time with him.... and at the same time I don't want him to feel abandoned or left out. Any recommendations on a therapist that specializes in teen would be appropriate it,
Thanks
May 8, 2023
Parent Replies
This may be a passing phase or a symptom of profound dis-ease. I think you are right to consider therapy, (will you son go? participate?). Pediatric therapists are hard to find and you should expect to pay out of pocket. I would also suggest family therapy. If it is a deeper problem, if there is trauma or mental illness, it does not necessarily start with your son - his behavior may only be a symptom. The other advantage to adding family therapy is to join him in treatment, rather than singling him out as "the problem" Good luck, I wish I had a specific practitioner to recommend
Hello - I could have written your note a year ago. Just wanted to say we got beyond it and things are night and day better. Maybe it's a phase that some kids go though and they grow out of it? We did a lot of interventions - sent him backpacking for a month with NOLS (can't recommend them enough), no more video games, swapped his phone for an apple watch, bribed him to do lots of outdoor activities, depression medication and worked with a psychiatrist (Jorien Campbell MD, not sure if she is taking new patients). Looking back I think he was in a lot of pain with the depression and that was the underlying cause that need to be treated. Also, try not to make him the 'identified patient' (as they call it), which is really hard because it feels like they are making life so miserable for everyone else. Our whole family had to work on doing things differently - I was definitely contributing to the dynamic and needed to work on changing too.