School question for social anxiety and inattentive ADD
Any public or private elementary, middle, or high school recommendations for a (currently) 10 yr-old w social anxiety and inattentive ADD? Any advice from parents w similar kids who have been there and done that?
The school(s) don't have to be in any particular location --it's slightly possible we could move to the north bay or a different part of the east bay for a promising fit. Or possibly even farther.
I'm optimistically wondering if there's a smaller public (charter?) Or private elementary, middle, or high school that could work for us. I know a lot of people have strong opinions, but I'm just hoping to explore all possible options. Feeling a little desperate.
So we're at a private school because they were going downhill fast at a Berkeley public school. They couldn't handle the social...games, for lack of a better word. I realize these games are impossible to eliminate, but I know schools where it's less intense. And when I say they were going downhill fast, I'm not exaggerating. It was serious.
Now they're a little stronger and older and we're thinking ahead to middle school/high school.
Private school is a stretch for us, both logistically and financially. The one we're at isn't a perfect fit for a number of reasons, even though it's a great school.
Homeschooling would also be a stretch for us. They need structure and regular/casual social interactions. They also love having teachers. I know some are able to integrate these aspects into homeschool, but I have explored it and have some serious doubts we could do it.
Any advice is welcome! Thanks!
Parent Replies
First thought that comes to mind for a smaller charter school is ACLC in Alameda. They are a tuition-free charter middle school and high school. 360 students today between both middle and high school.
I know you said homeschooling would be a stretch but there are programs that don’t require you to develop the curriculum. It could be worth considering especially during the challenging middle school years when the social games increase and everyone is at dramatically different developmental levels. Look into California Connections Academy. It’s essentially an online school. We’re about to start our third year and my kids have virtual classrooms that meet regularly along with teachers who assign and grade work. There are also field trips. It’s worked very well, especially for my child with attention challenges.
A couple of thoughts, as a parent of a 14 yo with diagnosed anxiety & ADHD with a 504 at public high school, and a 12 yo who I'm sure has both but doesn't meet the diagnostic criteria (I could write a novel about how the criteria are oriented to boys). The ways the conditions have manifested have changed over the years. My 14 yo seems to be experiencing them in a less severe way while my 12 yo more severely, compared to 3 or 5 years ago. When my 14 yo was really in the grip of the conditions, we did use medication - it doesn't matter which one, because YMMV and it really is a call for a doctor to make. It helped! I wish we could get an Rx for 12. Without that diagnosis, we did end up putting 12 in a private school with small(er) classes/pods; as a generally high performing student, that has worked in this case. We are looking at smaller high schools for them, so they may not go to the public high school that 14 is at. However, that public high school is not our local school; we chose to transfer into it (among other reasons) because it has a reputation as a relatively small, calm h.s. and at one time, the 14 yo was made deeply anxious by classroom shenanigans going on around them. Nowadays, I'm not sure they would be rattled. So, all this is to say, the conditions which are really driving your questions now are dynamic and they may or may not be the same size of factor for high school. Ultimately I think small class sizes and calm classrooms are ideal for all children, and to the extent you can stretch and make that happen for your child... we felt like we should.