Montessori for active boys?
Do any kids have active boys in Montessori or non-Montessori classrooms? How has your active boy been and have they had any problems in the classroom?
Our active boy toddler has just been asked to leave his Montessori as they have are finding he needs more one on one attention and he’s having problems sitting still. The other consideration is that they have had really high turnover (8 teachers) and now 18 toddlers (18-3years) The school thinks he might have a sensory issue, but my pediatrician thinks he’s just a normal active boy.
Aug 14, 2019
Parent Replies
I would listen to your pediatrician. We had a similar experience at an elementary Montessori program in El Cerrito. We were told they thought our active son had sensory issues, dyslexia, significant ADHD, and suspected Oppositional Defiant Disorder. We took him for testing with his pediatrician and a more in depth neuropsych evaluation at the school's recommendation. Not only did he NOT have any of these issues (ADHD was the only thing that was even borderline,) the doctor laughed at the thought of all of these possible diagnoses. To be sure, we asked not only the neuropsychologist to visit the classroom and observe, but we also paid for an educational consultant and occupational therapist to observe and evaluate. They all said the same thing, so we left Montessori in 2nd grade and moved him to Chabot Elementary, where he thrived. He had some bad habits from his time at Montessori, walking around the classroom, going to the bathroom without asking, eating snacks when he wanted, but the teachers worked with us, and he is now going into middle school with the skill set needed to be a good student. Oh- and the dyslexia concern? As soon as we moved him from Montessori, he learned 1000 sight words in 3 1/2 weeks. He now reads significantly above grade level, and we have actual standardized tests to show it. As a side note, one thing that was of great concern was that when we brought the test results to the Montessori school, we were met with disbelief. I was told that the only thing that would help my child was medication. I wish we had started at Chabot for kindergarten. Good Luck!
That is an excellent question. I know when my daughter was in a Montessori (which since closed when the owner retired), the school hired my husband to play active outside games for two hours a day with the active boys, because traditional Montessori was not working for their energy levels. This really worked well, he had them running up and down a dirt hill and kicking balls all over the place and they loved it, so maybe ask around at other schools if they do this too. If not, maybe suggest a parent volunteer to be the active person.
My son is now in elementary school but when he had just turned 5 he was asked to leave a well-regarded Montessori school. They said there was something terribly wrong with him and insisted he leave even when we brought in an expert (who they recommended) saying otherwise. He went on to public school where he has thrived. I think he was just an overactive little boy they couldn't figure out, which I suppose is their right as a private school, but I really dislike what they put us through. Watch out when they start throwing labels and diagnoses around.
Hi There, we went through what seems to be a very similar situation as you. Our “active” boy was enrolled in a highly regarded Montessori School in the Kensington Hills. From day one he was labeled as bad and defiant and he could never shake the title. Here's the thing: a good Montessori school with trained teachers should be able to meet your child where they are at, no matter what personality type or even developmental shortcomings. If this school had this, they never would have asked you to leave, and worked with your family. Our family did end up leaving our Montessori school because it was just too contentious for us and our kid. We took him to 2 pediatricians that said what your MD said; it was normal developmental behavior. Once we stopped listening to the school and followed medical advice (and our own intuition) everything just fell into place. Our son was SO happy at his new school, which is non Montessori and his “behavior issues” seemingly disappeared. If you can look for another school (what awful timing on the school's part, since most are full) do it. It’s not your son. It’s a hybrid Montessori school that thinks they understand child development gone awry (and they make you think it too!). I am more than happy to chat with you further and even recommend some awesome schools. Just message me and good luck. I know this is a stressful time.
It’s not him. It’s them. That’s a crazy amount of turnover for any classroom, but especially for toddlers. If they really followed Montessori principles, they’d figure out how to meet his needs.
Ive been a Childcare/preschool director for 20 years, and they’re just taking out their incompetence on your kid. Find a new program, teachers are more important then the philosophy.