Looking for a family therapist
Our family is not from the US but we have been living in the Bay Area for a while. After the whole stress due to the pandemic I, (the mom), feel emotionally drained and don't want to be here anymore. We don't have that many friends and I miss real connections with others. I am trying to meet people through volunteering, but my connections are mainly superficial.
My husband has a great job, our kids go to great schools. So it really is mainly me who feels isolated and wants to leave. One complications is, that one of our children has a neurological condition and is hard to manage. I hope that a family therapist can help us.
Does anyone have any current leads on family therapists? Ideally therapists who are experienced in living abroad, children with Special needs etc?
Thanks!
Parent Replies
I would highly recommend working with psychologist, Dr. Mauro Ferrero. He is an older Italian that changed careers and has now lived many years in the US, and we have talked quite a bit about living in the US vs in Europe, strong community vs relative lonliness. He has a lovely demeanor, and he is great at guiding through hard issues, problem solving, giving helpful tools and ways of understanding these kind of challenges. We have talked through many couples and parenting issues. Dr. Ferrero is located in LA, but meeting virtually has been great. His email address is: mauroferrero2011 [at] yahoo.com (mauroferrero2011[at]yahoo[dot]com)
Good for you for asking for help and for doing something right away. Once you take the leap, it gets so much easier.
I was unhappy for years and I never did anything (I was waiting for my husband to agree to marriage counseling) but it was mostly b/c I was too scared to do it myself. We are currently in counseling and now I really see that I should have done this years before - with or without him. There was also space for me to understand how my mind works and why (based on my history).
Here are a few recommendations/considerations:
1. If you have Kaiser, and want this to be partially paid, you can go through their assessment process and choose a therapist there or outside Kaiser. It’s a pain and time consuming but the cost will be less. I feel they are overworked and understaffed so I did my assessment and then went with an outside therapist to get reimbursed. In my situation, I was told to have the billing through me but I’m essentially using it as marriage counseling.
2. For couples therapy, I really liked the IMAGO technique and found a therapist that was certified. The website and YouTube has more info. One thing I’ll say is that there are more certified therapists than what’s listed on the website above. I had a short list of ppl from my insurance and then called/emailed each one to see if they were imago certified. https://harvilleandhelen.com/initiatives/what-is-imago/
3. Based on what you wrote, it sounds like you may benefit from seeing someone on a personal basis, in addition to family or marriage counseling. The woman we see is in Pleasant Hill here: https://www.amadorpsychotherapycenter.com
I feel this is a very personal choice - she doesn’t do family anymore but does do individuals and couples. The important thing is to take the leap as you may not get the right fit on the first try. Also your needs may change over time.
4. You may also want to have an assessment from a psychiatrist for depression. I’ve heard from multiple people that the medications are so good now and you can really fine-tune what is best for your chemistry such that it’s just like wearing a new set of glasses.
You’re almost there. Before you know it, you’ll be getting help.
Hi Fellow Parent - My therapist also works on family counseling and I highly recommend Dr. Selph. His link: http://www.selphsolutions.com/