How Much Sleep Does a Teen Need?
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Geez Louise, How Much Sleep Does a Teenage Boy Need?
July 2011
My son is going on 14, and it's unbelievable how much he sleeps!! He is sleeping right now, and if i don't go throw water, ice or something worse on him, he will just stay in bed until like 1:30pm! True, we got back after 12:10am from watching fireworks last night, but even @ county fairgrounds he plunked down on a towel and zonked out @ about 5:30pm.
This started at age 11 (middle school, which he did not like). He'd been in martial arts but decided to boycott it since he did not want to get up @ 8:15am anymore on Sat. Now he has no extra-curricular activities except the computer (to the point that he had to get glasses this year when all his life previously he'd had 20/20 vision), occasional bike rides & visits w/ friends. When I take him out to beach, swimming, fairs etc. it's a HUMUNGOUS effort to drag him off the bed & requires threatening, pleading, throwing water etc. until finally i lock up computer (or threaten to) & that gets him up.
Fortunately he attended ID Tech Camp last 2 years, which is educational, fun & good use of time (though I'm not sure if it's sociable, since he didn't make any friends there). I also get him into summer camps where they go fishing, bowling, 6 Flags, etc. (he often says ''Big whoopee'' sarcastically about all the above, since he only seems to love the computer). But between the extended lengths of time in bed & the extended time sitting on couch using the laptop I am worried that 1) He doesn't get enough fresh air, exercise & blood circulation, 2) The computer use is actually making him more lethargic & less inclined to go out & play (I already know it can cause insomnia) and 3) he is turning into an old man way before his time--that is what he seems like, laying in bed or sitting on the couch all the time.
He is in therapy, but so far I don't see anything changed @ all and am wondering what the use is or how long before any results are seen. I took him for a physical & it was normal, no anemia, nothing but Vitamin D deficiency (I got vitamins).
What is a parent to do? Is this ''normal'', a passing stage? I did not go thru this @ this age, nor did any of my friends! Is too much sleep harmful? When it's 4 of July and i have plans to go to the Fair (he agrees that the rides, shows, fireworks & all are fun) I cannot even get him up for that & we end up getting there at 3pm--more than 1/2 the day wasted, & no time to see animals, etc. There was barely time to go on 3 of those free rides we all like so much. Any suggestions, comments? This can't be normal
What you are experiencing with your son sounds a little familar... When I was about 11 or 12 I developed a thyroid condition that zapped me of energy. Before I was diagnosed, when I'd go to a friends house to play, all I wanted to do was lay on their bed!!! I was really an athletic kid prior to that.
As an adult female, I still have to monitor my meds to make sure I'm getting enough or not too much thyroid hormone, etc. Thyroid conditions are ususally pretty benign but I would encourage you to have a complete blood work-up done on him and also have his thyroid levels checked.
He may be experiencing the normal teenage indifference, but it's worth checking. Good Luck! Mom of a Pre-teen
To a certain extent it's normal. The boy needs a week at the river with no gadgets, just animals. You might want to have him looked at. It could be depression or Chronic fatique syndrome. Does he sleep at night? Reenie
I know your son is going to a therapist, but has he been evaluated for depression, or anything under the pdd (pervasive developmental disorder) umbrella? A good psychiatrist for teens is Zena Potash in Walnut Creek. Her phone number is: 925-934-6238. Karen
The answer is lots! I slept for about 10 hours a day as a teen and was an A student and Varsity athelete (and grew up to 5 inches in one year). Once I headed to college I decided for myself that 10 hours was like spending half of my life asleep and I cut back. Most kids are sleep deprived, IMHO, these days. Just make sure he isn't sleeping during the day because he is up all night on the computer or phone (not unusual). cocosar
I have sympathy rather than solutions for you, I'm afraid. First, I do think that kids this age need a lot more sleep. I've had a few teens through my home (biological, guests and foster) and was often amused by how they would just conk out on the couch during family time. Some woke fairly easily, and others just couldn't be roused. My oldest child (now 21) still typically sleeps until noon when she can. And at this very moment, I'm wishing my 13-year-old foster son would get up and get to camp on time.
It is really, really hard and sad when you want to do family things and your teen or pre-teen won't get up. If you've confirmed that your son isn't depressed or having a sleep disorder, then you might have to just accept that this is how it's going to be for a while. Make sure his bedtime is early enough. If his sleep cycle seems off, check out Ferber's ''Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems'' which includes lots of useful info on teen sleep behavior.
Some tactics: Set limits on how much screen time he gets (we have a weekly amount, with ways to earn and lose time for good or bad behavior for our 13-year-old). If he's old enough to be left alone, then go do things without him--let him know without angst or anger that you won't wait all day for him. During times when our son is out of screen time and wants to stay home rather than go out and have fun, we also quietly put away the computer cords. Set some minimum requirements for time spent in physical activity or out of the house or at camp, and use the screen time for leverage. Since our foster son is very anxious and would rather hole up at home than interact with the world, he earns double-time for physical activity (half-hour of ping pong equal an hour of screen time).
As far as the sarcasm and bad attitude are concerned, those might be age-related too. My eldest was not like this, but my foster son sure is, and the feedback I've gotten from this list is that it's typical. It stinks. Try to let him make his own decisions and pay his own consequences. Insist on attendance at some things, especially those not in the morning--we insisted on a baseball game which our teen loved despite the grumbling and but-whying beforehand. Let him miss out on the morning things if he won't get up. Lord get me through this age
Another possible factor might be how much screen time he gets. A recent study showed that men who used LEED (flat screen) computer monitors got exposed to more blue light than the old-fashioned, deep monitor. For some reason this suppressed their melatonin (sleep hormone) production and kept them more alert for hours afterwards. Fluorescent (curly) light bulbs and flat screen TVs also have more blue light than incandescent bulbs and old-fashioned TVs. You can't do anything about cell phone and laptop screens. Good luck!
Wake-up time on weekends
May 2007
A friend with 2 teenagers told me that she doesn't let her kids sleep past 10am on the weekends - too much 'sleeping away the day' or something. I've always let my (teenage) kids sleep until they wake up on the weekends - I figure they get up early every weekday, their bodies must need the rest. But now that she mentioned it, I wondered if it's a good idea. What do you think?
wake up call?
If her schedule permits (she often has commitments), we let our 15-year-old sleep in until her body tells her she's had enough. Everyone needs recharging. The only caveat: a reasonable bedtime (11-11:30) even on weekends, so that her system doesn't go too much out of sync.
Mom
Oh for crying out loud, let your kids sleep!!! Studies from NIMH and others suggest that the school schedules of our kids, versus their natural sleep needs are so whacked out it's no wonder they can't focus in school. Let them sleep. Let them get a good night's sleep, if only on weekends. Let them do what you would do if you were relentlessly asked to perform. Just Let Them Sleep. They'll get up and they'll be healthy for it -- when they're ready.
Wish I'd been able to sleep in!
There are several good resources on teens and sleep. Most recommend that teens get about 9 hours a night, but few teens I know actually do. What most teens don't understand is that this actually slows them down -- better sleep means better concentration, focus, memory, and energy. Here are some links from:
the National Sleep Foundation: https://sleepfoundation.org/sleep-topics/teens-and-sleep
the UCAL Sleep Center: http://sleepcenter.ucla.edu/sleep-and-teens
and a good one from Stanford, arguing that sleep deprivation among teens is an "epidemic": https://med.stanford.edu/news/all-news/2015/10/among-teens-sleep-depriv…
Of course, knowing all this and convincing your teen are two different things.
There is some research which points to teens needing 10 hrs. of sleep nightly based on how much growing they're doing.
After raising 4 kids who all slept long hours as teens, I can honestly say that allowing them to sleep as long as they wanted made for a healthier and happier life for all of us. Of course they had to get their butts out of bed for school, etc. Teens, especially boys, need a lot of sleep.
I have two daughters who do the same, you are not alone. If you want him to get up earlier get him involved in something which requires him to get up early like sports. My daughter use to sleep until noon, then she started playing basketball and tennis and now get up at 5:30am and can't stay awake much past 9:30.
To answer your question of how much sleep teenagers need? Everyone is different and needs change over time. The rule in our house is let them sleep. There's a reason they need that much sleep for proper development.
You haven't done enough research. Teens need their sleep- I let my 13 year old sleep as long as he wants too. Studies have shown that the early morning schedule of high school in particular does a teen no favors. It's summer who cares if he sleeps until noon? He has some job to get to? At this age still, kids are doing their growing when they sleep so really just let him be. What a silly thing for your husband to argue about- he sounds way too controlling and this will only lead to more issues with your teenage boy as he grows older. Sleep is one of the few things your son should have control of. So unless his dad has some fantastic reason for waking his son up at 8:30 during summer vacation then dad should leave son alone.
I have read numerous articles about this and they all state that teens need 10-12 hours of sleep a night. Let him sleep!
I assume that he is sleeping this late only one weekends and in the summer, not on school days? You didn't say what time he goes to bed and how many hours of sleep he is actually getting. Normal teens need about 8-10 hrs of sleep per night and this is quite variable. My almost 15 year old gets about 9 hrs per night and will sleep in on weekends if he has been really active with sports or had some nights when he had trouble falling asleep. I think it is well documented that teens circadian rhythms make them want to naturally stay up late and sleep in late and some researches have recommended that schools change to later start times to accommodate this natural rhythm. And as a night owl myself, married to an early bird, having different people in the household with different sleep schedules can be very difficult. I love staying up late because the house is quiet, I can focus on projects, but know that I need to discipline myself to stay on a normal bedtime or I would be going to bed naturally at 2-3AM and waking up at 9-11AM. My teen wants to stay up late on weekends, but sometime I am tired or am trying to keep myself on a good sleep schedule and I don't want him wandering around the house or on computers and devices after all the adults have gone to bed. He too needs to keep on a good sleep schedule. Getting enough sleep is really important, and especially for a growing teen. I would say tell your husband that your son might need to catch up on sleep on the weekends, and help your son to establish a good sleep pattern during the week so it doesn't get totally out of hand.