In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)

Parent Q&A

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  • Monitor only patient for IVF

    Sep 21, 2022

    Hello! I am a Kaiser member who has frozen embryos stored at a clinic in LA (not affiliated with Kaiser), due to previous IVF (before I was a Kaiser member). I am hoping to do a transfer now, and Kaiser says they cannot perform any of the pre-work/diagnostics/tests leading up to the transfer (the transfer would be done by the LA clinic anyway - I do not plan on moving the embryos to Kaiser). As I do not want to be making multiple trips down to LA just for the pre-work, the Kaiser nurse said that my best bet would be to contact a local fertility clinic here in Bay Area and ask to be a monitor-only patient. Does anyone have experience with this? If not, can anyone just recommend a local IVF doctor/clinic and I can reach out myself to see if they would accept me as a monitor-only patient? Please - only recommendations based on personal experience. Googling can only get me so far. Thank you!

    I have had good experiences at Spring fertility based here in the bay… Oakland, SF, Danville, there are many clinics, some which just do monitoring and some that see you for the actual procedures. I am not sure if they do monitoring only but it would be worth asking! They’re always pleasant when I talk to them and helpful, so I hope they’d be a good fit! Right now I’m seeing Dr. Fisher and he is great. Good luck! Their number is 415-964-5618 

    I was in a similar situation when I was a surrogate (x2) several years ago. I lived in the Bay Area but my IVF doctor was in LA. I did make several day trips to LA for appointments, but was able to save myself some travel by being a monitor-only patient at Pacific Fertility Center the first time around, and at Laurel Fertility Care the second. I'm not sure if they are still offering that as an option, but if not, maybe they can offer some other recommendations. Good luck!

    I am unfortunately familiar with this problem. You have limited options. For bloodwork, most labs can do it — my clinic works with Labcorp, and they were fine but won’t do same day fertility labs on weekends. For a transfer, not as much of an issue usually. 
     

    For ultrasound, you have four options I know of. 1) The cheapest is Scanbabies…. But it’s in Los Gatos. They get a lot of fertility monitoring patients.  2) Aimee Eyvazzadeh’s office will do it Monday-Friday (and sometimes they can squeeze you in on weekends.) This is where I went. It’s in San Ramon which is a hassle but not as bad as Los Gatos. 3) El Cerrito Ultrasound (I think that’s the name?) claims to do it but I don’t know anyone who’s gone. I think they’re pretty new. 4) there’s a diagnostic imaging place in Elk Grove. 
     

    Good luck! For the bloodwork, my out of town clinic was very helpful in coordinating. You might ask your clinic if there’s a lab they like. 

    I did local monitoring at UCSF for IVF with a Southern California clinic. UCSF was great. They do monitoring only for a lot of patients and they were very organized. There were never issues with them sending my results to my clinic promptly. The services were at the Mission Bay campus early in the morning so the commute to SF wasn’t too bad. Good luck with your transfer!

    1st—commiseration and support. My health insurance is with Kaiser but my IVF is not, and Kaiser has been (for the last 3 years!) continually resistant to any requests (labs, ultrasounds) not ordered by their drs (and while I see their point on occasion, most of this seems to be institutional petulance!). My suggestion Re: Kaiser is to “advocate” (fight, niggle, annoy!) until you get some of the things that really do seem reasonable for them to fulfill as your healthcare team (this has worked in most circumstances for me). 

    2–For IVF, I work with UCSF and have loved them from the start. I also consulted with Spring Fertility but ultimately went with UCSF. 
     

    Best of luck+power to you! 

    Thank you all. OP here, I have an update, in case anyone goes through anything similar in this period:

    • UCSF does take outside monitoring patients. However, they are VERY expensive, for the pre-work (saline sono) that I needed. I decided in the end to not go with them. But they are very professional and have a well-oiled process in place. Just be sure to ask about costs, if this is an issue for you.
    • Dr. Aimee in San Ramon - I ended up going with them because they were also very easy to work with and were more reasonably priced, though a bit far from me because they are in San Ramon.
    • Reproductive Medicine Associates (SF) - They do some outside monitoring (standard u/s and bloodwork), but they could not do the saline sono. However, I found them also very reasonable in terms of price.
    • Other clinics that came recommended to me but basically shut down their outside monitoring services after COVID happened were Spring Fertility, Pacific Fertility, and RSC.

    Hope that is helpful to anyone, and thank you for the well wishes!

    We were in a similar situation with our embryos in Chicago, but ended up using Cryostork to move them out here so we could do everything all together at one clinic. With the monitoring, it was a pain to try to get the doctors to work together, didn't account for any complications and for basically the same cost of travel we were able to move the embryos. We ended up working with Dr. Morin at RMA in SF and had a great experience! We still laugh about how our baby was the only member of the family who got to travel in 2020. 

    I see your update on the saline sono -- I was able to get Kaiser to cover a hysteroscopy by asking my RE for it as a non-fertility thing.  Message me if you'd like more details about the appropriate language to use.  

    How friendly are you with your OB at Kaiser?  I went through 3 long years of fertility treatment at UCSF and my Kaiser OB (who I love) helped me in as many ways as she could.  I even ended up having an expensive fibroid surgery at Kaiser because UCSF said I needed it, and my doc helped make it happen.  They performed the D&C when I miscarried. Then she delivered my son.  I'm sure there was a lot of luck at play in this, but I'd start by including your OB on your plans and seeing if they'll support you.  Don't call member services - they will definitely say no. 

  • We're going the IVF route as our last shot to get pregnant. We've met with doctors at two clinics so far (UCSF and Spring) and haven't been particularly blown away. Wondering if people have good/bad experiences with either of these two, or if they'd recommend another practice in the East Bay? Particularly interested in experiences of women 40+ using own eggs, and also in hearing from people who had cycles with more than one clinic and which you preferred. Thank you so much.

    I just got pregnant at 40 with low ovarian reserve at Reproductive Science Center in Oakland with Dr Rosenbluth. They are awesome. They never pushed donor eggs on me though they were honest about our chances and how many rounds of ivf it would likely take. In our case I actually didn’t have enough eggs for ivf but somehow managed to get pregnant with an IUI. We also did ivf with them to conceive my four year old. They give you a dedicated case manager which makes you feel less like an anonymous number (looking at you Kaiser Fremont) and my doctor was open to my input when it came to treatment options and medications. 
     

    good luck to you!

    I went through months of (failed) IVF treatments at age 40 through Kaiser Fremont and I STRONGLY recommend against them. I switched to Spring Oakland and had just gone through a few consults and was very happy with their approach (much more individualized than Kaiser, which felt like a factory). Ultimately we ended up getting pregnant on our own and so didn't use Spring. But from my interactions with them, and from speaking with other older women who had gone through treatment there, I was really hopeful for our chances with Spring.

    I have had many friends go to both of these clinics and felt very well taken care of and had good results. Their expertise and experience at both of these clinics is quite well known so you'd unlikely to find a clinic with higher success rates. You'll probably get a bit more personal attention/hand holding with Spring but UCSF does have more years of experience in this field. 

    We used Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh (in San Ramon) and can’t say enough great things about her. She is the absolute best doctor I’ve ever met. I interviewed several clinics around the Bay Area and am so glad we went with Dr. Aimee in the end. Her bedside manner is unparalleled. I was 38 and used my own eggs, fyi. Good luck on your journey! 

    I highly recommend Dr. Susan Willman. She helped us get pregnant a long time ago. And I will never forget how respectful she was, how well she listened, helped figure out what was going on, and advocated for us. She's in Orinda. 

    I’m now 42 and used my own eggs at Spring. They were great in my eyes, I got what I wanted, a rainbow baby. I did 4 cycles and 2 transfers. Process was about 1 1/2

    Spring has been a pleasure to work with. Our friends used both Spring and UCSF (and Stanford) and strongly preferred Spring, primarily because they were far more organized and customer-focused.

    I was 45 when I went to spring after several miscarriages. We saw Dr. Tran and he came up with a practical approach that had me pregnant at the first attempt. Our boy is now 3! I wilL say that this first healthy egg I believe was the result of an intense 3 month fertility cleanse with lot so supplements, ubiquinol etc I undertook with Carol Lourie. I’ve had several over 40 friends dramatically improve their ‘fertility stats’ and get pregnant with intense nutritional and supplement support. 

    Hi, I had a bad experience with Dr. Mitch Rosen at UCSF. He was extremely unprofessional and was very rough with my body. Send me a message if you want more details. I switched to RSC in Orinda and had a much better experience. 

    We had a very positive experience at Reproductive Science Center. We worked primarily with Evan Rosenbluth, but also really liked Dr. Hinckley and Dr. Homer. I was 39 at the time of transfer, so can't speak to the over 40 experience but found Rosenbluth to be patient, kind and straightforward. 

    We looked at Kaiser, UCSF and Spring.  Contact me offline if you want to discuss further as there is a lot that can be said.
    You posted anonymously, so cannot contact you directly.  

    We had a great experience at Spring. Highly recommend them. Both my partner and I did retrieval cycles. Then I completed a transfer and gave birth to a healthy baby girl. I turned 40 last year. I thought the doctors at Spring were very knowledgeable and the staff is amazing. We have been to the SF and Oakland clinics. We had previously gone to Laurel for IUI (unsuccessful) and we had a negative experience. They just weren’t on top of info and it felt really unorganized. Also, I think going right to IVF would have been a better option. We were so happy to find Spring! I feel confident in our ability to continue to grow our family with their help. If you didn’t connect with the doctor you met with, ask the staff for another recommendation. They helped us find the right fit. 

    I highly recommend Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh in San Ramon ("Dr. Aimee"). She is AMAZING. She hleped me conceived when I was 43 years old and (ultimately with donor eggs), and now we have a 15-month-old son. I worked with multiple fertility clinics in the bay area and out of state (including Kaiser and CCRM Colorado) before finding Dr. Aimee, and the difference was huge. She does not accept health insurance, as far as I know, so you have to have the finances to fund the fertility services yourself. But for us it was so worth it. (I didn't have coverage for IVF anyway). Go see Dr. Aimee! I LOVE HER. Good luck on your journey!

    https://draimee.org/

    Rosa

    We went to Spring twice, once when I was 38 for my husband in SF, and once when I was 42 for my age in Oakland. I loved Dr. Menjarez at Spring in Oakland, but I didn't love the SF practice. Unfortunately, she just retired. Dr. Fisher also saw us in Oakland, and I really liked him too, I am just someone who always chooses a female over a male practitioner. They also have a practice in San Jose, and Dr. Harris did our retrieval, and he was great too. Overall, even though IVF is an awful thing to go through, I had an amazing experience with Spring Oakland. They really try to take care of you, and referred us to a therapist who specializes in infertility after our cycle didn't work, and she is excellent. In this light, I would caution you, before you spend a ton of money, that age is a major factor in infertility over 40, and I didn't really understand this until I went through IVF at 42. Everyone says this, like don't wait until after 35 to have kids, but you see people all around you in the Bay Area having kids well into their 40s, and moms with gray hair everyday, and in my experience, it's impossible not to be hopeful. But you don't know their stories, or what they went through to have those kids, whether it was hundreds of thousands of dollars in IVF cycles, or using donor eggs, or if they just got incredibly lucky. I think we just assume IVF can fix things. We were able to conceive our son naturally after figuring out some health issues with my husband when I was about to turn 39, which I now realize was very very lucky, because normal fertility only lasts until age 38. After that, it starts to take multiple cycles to get normal embryos, which is a lot of money, and a lot of stress, and a lot of grief. IVF can't fix age, even if you have lots of eggs left, and even if you try multiple cycles, and the grief can be enormous. For us, it was worth the money to give it a shot, but we couldn't afford to do more than one cycle, and there is no guarantee with your own eggs even with multiple cycles that you will get any normal embryos when you're older. From someone who was once in your shoes, and who has friends that used donor eggs in their 40s, I hope you will find something that will work for you. Wishing you the best of luck <3        

    I'm 38 so not in the 40+ group but saw Dr Martha Noel at UCSF and loved her. She listened to our concerns, didn't push us in any direction, supported our decisions/opinions, was responsive to questions via the portal and follow up phone calls. All of the PAs, nurses, and lab techs were great too. I don't think either I or my husband had a neg experience and we were there first just as a consult patient, then IUI, then IVF so we spent a lot of time over a 9+ month period with them. Good luck! 

    I've used both clinics - started at UCSF, then transferred to Spring when my doctor, Dr. Tran, started it. I can't imagine trusting anyone aside from Dr. Tran. He's incredible and I respect his work ethic and knowledge. I am the mother of two and soon-to-be mother of a third, all thanks to him. I can't recommend him highly enough (I'm 39, used my own eggs, for reference). My very best wishes to you!

    I’m 38 and my husband is 45, and we’ve been working with Spring since 2018. My primary physician is Dr. Tran but I’ve seen many of their doctors and have been to their SF, Oakland, and Redwood City offices. We’ve had two retrievals and two successful transfers (pregnant with our second now). They also diagnosed our infertility. While I’ve found their bedside manner can leave something to be desired, for me personally, I’ve focused more on the results. They are organized, efficient, and at least for me, have a process that really works. I trust them, from their medication protocol, to their procedural abilities, to their handling of my embryos. So - I’d say it depends on what matters to you. If you’re looking for a more nurturing environment, I’ve heard that Kindbody is focused on that aspect of the patient experience (though I don’t know anyone personally who has worked with them). I should say, that I got some of the nurturing support I was looking for from my acupuncturist, who I saw weekly leading up to my procedures and who provided acupuncture services immediately before and after my transfers. Best of luck…I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you. 

    I worked with Dr. Phillip Chenete in San Francisco 20 years ago and LOVED him and his entire staff! (However I am not a fan of one of his partners, Dr. Herbert.) I was 37 at the time and appreciated that he worked with older women and wasn't worried about his success statistics. Some practices were turning away older women because of this. I had a fresh IVF cycle with an early miscarriage and then had a frozen embryo transfer that resulted in my youngest daughter. I think he's worth travelling to San Francisco for! https://www.pacificfertilitycenter.com/fertility-specialists/philip-e-c…;(415) 834-3095. Good luck!

    We used Spring in Oakland during the pandemic. I'm 39 and used my own eggs (we harvested 23 and had 2 viable embryos). We also did PGT to test the embryos which is why the embryo number is so low. We did one transfer and got pregnant. We now have a 2.5 month old. We paid out of pocket and it was worth every penny. 

    We loved Spring. Hope this helps!

    Do not waste your time at Kaiser if you have Kaiser insurance. We did not have a good experience there and left for Spring. 

    Hi there,

    I have experiences with both the practices you mentioned. Ultimately I did IVF with UCSF. I conceived my daughter at 40 & she’s 3+ months now. I would be happy to chat with you further online, or maybe easier via the phone.

    Erica

    We also went to Dr. Susan Willman in Orinda, and had a wonderful experience with her. She was creative and thoughtful and respectful.

    I just completed my egg retrieval process. I am 35 yrs old. I was also debating between providers - rather obsessing over them. I ultimately decided to pick UCSF. In UCSF you may not feel like you have a personalized care, however, you can be assured that their IVF labs are best in class. Most important part of IVF IMO is the Labs where embryos grow. At the start I was very doubtful - I kept thinking if I made the right choice. But as I went through the process, it helped establish trust. Keep in mind UCSF is less aggressive, so you may have to keep pushing the doctor. Additionally, since it is a busy hospital, you may have to be pro-active. My doctor was Yanett Anaya. She kept tweaking my IVF protocol and helped us get appropriate number of eggs. Good luck!

    i know a lot of women who've done IVF in bay area, and the general consensus is that Kaiser sucks, Spring is good but currently over-committed and has bad customer service cause they can't handle their current caseload (maybe they'll fix this soon), UCSF has good docs but terrible customer service, RSC is good but small, and Dr. Aimee is great but $$$. I had great experience at PFC (we did 10 cycles there) but driving to the city for eveyr appointment was super time-consuming. 

    We went to Spring after a long journey with Kaiser. Kaiser San Ramon was fine for IUIs but when IVF came up for Fremont we turned into an invisible patient and could never talk to the same providers/nurses. It wasn’t worth it since we were paying out of pocket. 
    Spring was incredible. I started there at 39 and had our baby at 40 years old. He’s 1.5yrs now. I was with Dr Minjarez who is probably the most tenured in her profession in the entire Bay Area. She just retired but I also loved Dr Harris. Dr Tan had a lack luster bedside manner but he was intelligent and made the right decisions for things when Dr Minjarez wasn’t there. 
    I would go back there again in a heartbeat. I recommend all our friends to go to Spring.  

    I ultimately got pregnant at home, but I really loved my consult with Aimee Eyvazzadeh. Her marketing is kind of weird and intense but she is GREAT. She sent me a lit review to explain one of her practices. 
     

    She’s expensive! My feeling at the time was that I was not a simple case and didn’t have much time, and therefore it was worth prioritizing expertise over money given that I could make it work. 

    I second Dr. Chenette and Pacific Fertility Center in San Francisco. The clinic is off the Embarcadero, and takes less than 20 min for me to get to from Oakland (not during rush hour). I had a great experience with Dr. Chenette, as well as Dr. Agard and the entire care team. Very professional, responsive, and I felt like I had a lot of information available to me to make our choices. I had been recommended PFC from women in my network, and have since recommended to multiple others. I had previously frozen eggs in my mid 30s, and having our first baby with fresh eggs from a recent retrieval at 41. Feel free to DM me, happy to answer any questions and good luck!

    I never ended up publishing the review below but I thought I'd share my own negative experience with Spring in response to your question.  Spring apologized and refunded our costs, but I would still not recommend them.  I went to Spring in 2018, got pregnant on my own in 2019, and had a baby in 2020.  Good luck and I hope you find an option that works for you!

    I've pretty much liked all of my doctors over the last 35 years, but my experience with Spring and Dr. Tran was negative and stressful due to a medical mix-up that took weeks to resolve.  My fiance and I had an initial consultation with Spring, where we received genetic testing at their recommendation.  When the test results came back, Spring emailed us a pdf copy of our lab results showing that we were carriers of the same two incurable diseases, with a 1 in 4 chance of passing on each disease, along with a list of symptoms our children could have.  Some excerpts: "about 20% of affected infants die within the first year of life," "some may also experience stroke-like episodes," "females typically do not go through puberty," "babies with this condition who have brain abnormalities usually do not live past early childhood."  

    I was terrified but then did online research myself, since it seemed odd that our tests were so similar -- we were clear of >250 diseases but carriers for the same two, plus we had the same bad gene variant for both conditions (with ~200 variants of each gene).  Initially Spring dismissed my concerns (writing "I can assure you that your blood samples were not mixed up" and telling us that we would most likely have to pay for the retesting ourselves), but after I provided more evidence based on my own online research, they acknowledged that it was "very likely" that the initial samples were switched.  

    We came in to be retested, but my fiance's second sample was accidentally destroyed by the lab as a duplicate.  After his third blood test, we had an appointment with Dr. Tran where he told us again that we were carriers of the same two diseases, but it seems he had just forgotten that we were being retested.  Throughout this process, he did not come across as sympathetic or concerned, and he also speculated about my mother having had miscarriages, which she never did (as far as she knows) and bluntly told us that he didn't think we would be able to have children (which was later proven wrong).  Given all of the vulnerability and strong emotions people feel around fertility, with high stakes and financial costs, it is especially important to be tactful and sensitive, so this was a big shortcoming in our Spring process.

    All in all, it took over six weeks to find out that my fiance wasn't a carrier of any diseases (i.e. the lab ran both our tests using just my blood samples), and we were anxious the whole time.  I was able to identify the suspicious results with zero medical education, when they were overlooked by the medical team at Spring.  I imagine that Spring takes better care not to mix up eggs and embryos than they did with our blood samples, and it sounds like Spring will use our experience as a training opportunity to be better in the future, but I would still not recommend them.

  • Hello! I am posting this question for my good friend who is not a member of BPN:

    For someone looking to just freeze her eggs (for now, may need IVF in a couple of years), how did you choose amongst places like CCRM of SF, UCSF, or Stanford? Additional note: [She] has Kaiser insurance, so [she] believes everything will be out of pocket, so [she can't/is not planning] to eliminate choices based on coverage.

    Thank you so much in advance for any advice/suggestions!

    I was referred to UCSF Center for Reproductive Health in Mission Bay by my OBGYN. They have been amazing. They have IVF orientations that your friend could attend and ask questions, learn about their process, and meet one of their drs (whoever is running the session). I never really shopped around, I just went with my OB's recommendation, so I can't really speak to how we chose between any particular place. But I can tell you that we've been very happy with the team and the experience. All my Drs were chosen prior to covid for ease of getting to and from there from work in SF, which is obviously a little different now. I might prefer someone closer to home if I was doing it all over again because there are a lot of appointments involved with IVF and while it is only 20 minutes most of the time, those 4pm appointments can be a bummer of a drive both ways. 

    Having gone through the egg freezing process, it's going to be far easier for her to go to a place where some of her costs may be covered.  If she has Kaiser, she should look at Kaiser's fertility practice in SF.  If she really wants to look around, get personal references and have folks tell you about their experiences.  You can also talk about the success rates at each facility.

    Find the doctor and staff that's right for her.  Note:  she will be seeing the STAFF a lot, even more so than the doc.  So definitely get a feel for the NPs, nurses and office staff as well as the physician who honestly, you don't really see except for the initial consult and procedure.

    Hi there, having done IVF with UCSF and having KP insurance, the decision to freeze eggs will came down to cost. IVF services are not covered by primary insurance (thank Republic Congress members who worked on the Affordable Care Act). Every facility has their own pricing. Happy to talk offline about this. 

    In 1999 we used UCSF because of affordability. Unfortunately there was a problem with the cryogenic device they used and my eggs were destroyed. UCSF refunded us the entire cryogenic fee which as I recall wasn’t much, perhaps near 1K. My husband only wanted one child and I was happy having twins. 
    I’m certain they’ve got it right by now. 

    I did IVF at Laurel Fertility clinic in SF with Dr. Ekpo. I highly recommend her. I've had very good outcomes based on my age and been successful getting pregnant both times we did embryo transfers.
    So I did the egg retrieval process in addition to IVF. I paid out of pocket for everything. It was expensive but turns out worth every penny. Is there any way she can change her insurance and then do the egg retrieval and freeze?
    Also keep in mind once you freeze the eggs you then pay a monthly storage fee to keep them frozen, ours is $125/month. It's all very expensive so might be worth changing insurance ahead of time even if her monthly premium is really high.

  • My partner and I are at a standstill over what to do with our remaining IVF embryos - this was after many years of trying and multiple attempts at IVF. He says he is done building our family (2 kids, one from IVF and one spontaneous post-IVF, which totally totally confounded us). I am not sure if I am done with growing our family and in all honesty, would like one more (we have several remaining embryos). This has caused some strain on our marriage, and both of us acknowledge that it could cause greater rifts if we don't find resolution. Having a sense for how large our family would be wasn't something we talked about before having kids because there was a stage in our lives where even having one child was a distant dream. I would love to know any personal stories about whether anyone had encountered this same dilemma, how (if) you resolved it, as well as perspectives on embryo donation vs. discarding them. I am very open to thoughts for anyone who has been touched by infertility. Also, if you have any therapist recommendations who have specific experience in helping people (individual or couple) with this kind of dilemma (can be growing family and even more specifically, remaining embryos), please let me know the name. While I prefer to keep my own username anonymous, if you are comfortable providing yours so that I can reach out with more questions, that would be most appreciated but understand that this is also a sensitive topic. Thank you so much!

    Hi - we are an IVF family too... i did work with a therapist while pregnant from IVF with some issues i had. happy to give you her name (and even lend an ear too... we're discussing our next steps as well).

    Lnforner [at] gmail.com

    Hi,

    I had one child using IVF. My partner didn't want more children (he didn't one the first one to begin with). I decided that I was OK just having one. I donated my embryos to a family I found using  NRFA.org. We wrote an agreement stating what we expected out of our relationship. I wanted my son to potentially have a relationship with his blood sibling. A few years later, now my son is 5 and his "blood sibling" is 2. We communicate at least once a month,  we send family photos. We were supposed to meet this summer by everything got cancelled because of COVID. The family that I donated to had 4 miscarries before having this kid. They are very grateful. 

    Good luck with your choices!

    We were in your EXACT situation, down to the surprise second natural conception after years of infertility and IVF, and the divided opinions. When I was around 40 I decided “now or never” and my husband wasn’t on board, so we destroyed our frozen embryos. I thought I needed to close that door and move on. A few years later, as our kids got older (and life got easier!) he was more receptive to the idea of a third child, and I’ve often regretted our hastiness. My advice is to hold onto them; things change. 

    Hello there, 

    that sounds like A LOT. and i am familiar with it. After infertility on my partner's side and then possibly due to my age, we had IVF twice (once unsuccessfully and then successfully) and had extra embryos. We both knew that we didn't want any additional children but after all of the effort (physical and mental) to create those embryos, it felt unsettling to discard them. My partner was patient and I gave myself time to get use to the idea of donating the embryos to science. Since the cost of storage was about $30/month, I decided that the piece of mind to be able to sit on this decision was worth it. I had a friend in a similar situation and we would chat periodically about what we were going to do. even with both of us knowing that we didn't want additional children, we still wanted to hold onto them. after two years for me, i donated mine to science and feel good about it. in some ways, it's a relief because i don't need to think about it. i'm not sure what my friend has done but her son is now over 3 so perhaps she's made a similar decision. that being said, maybe not. I think the most important thing is that she feels good about her choice regardless of whether she holds onto them. 

    i'm sorry to hear that this is source of tension for you in your relationship. it sounds good that you are open to seeing a counselor as it would certainly be helpful. In my own situation, the idea of children (more or less) identified underlying issues in our relationship. my partner and i are no longer together and i wish that we didn't sweep so many things under the rug but i am pleased that i made choices based on what felt right for me (which also felt right for him). 

    Hi - I'd be interested in chatting about this privately if you'd send me a message.

    I agree with the person who responded to you by saying that things change. That goes for both your and your husband's opinion on having more kids. I don't have any experience with IVF, but I am almost 50 and have 2 kids, a 19 year old and an almost 8 year old.  I am familiar with aching for another child. I've had a period of clinical depression, because my husband wasn't as invested in that idea as I was and I didn't want to force him. Eventually, he gave in and we had our second one.  That's all I wanted at the time, and I was so happy to have my girl. We are a what you'd call a traditional family, have been married for over 20 years and still love each other. I always thought that our kids would be just like us and we wouldn't have any big issues with them. These days I wish I never had kids at all.  I love them both dearly, and my little girl is still just a kid, but the heartbreak and disappointments that I've gone through thanks to my older one negates the feeling of love and tenderness. I am ashamed to feel that way and would have never in million years expected it to be like this, but here we are.  As you are bathing in your happiness of being a mother to young kids, try to look ahead to the teenage and young adult years as truthfully as you possibly can.  Will you be able to finance everything you'd wish for them and yourself?  How about dealing with any health issues you all may have, or learning differences that are common to k? Having babies is addictive for us women. That's mother nature's way of keeping us from getting extinct. I can't imagine how it's for you when you already have the embryos, these almost babies, ready to go and having to decide to let go of them - or not.  So I can't offer any advice on how to deal with that aspect. Sorry.

    OP here - I am grateful for all your thoughtful responses. They were truly diverse, and it just goes to show that there are no right or wrong answers - only what is best for you. But also, it comes with a caveat because you can only make the decision that is best for you with the information that you have at that point in time. Thank you all for the resources and being open to sharing your experiences. To the one who responded with the 19 year old and 8 year old - it sounds very challenging what you are going through with your older one. I appreciate your response very much (no need to be sorry for it). I hope that things improve over time and that you can find the support you need for navigating this period...

Archived Q&A and Reviews


Questions

Considering a frozen embryo transfer while breastfeeding

Feb 2014

Hello,

a couple of months ago, I was blessed to give birth to a beautiful baby who was conceived via IVF. We are now starting to think of when to attempt #2 - we still have some frozen embryos that are waiting to be transferred. We don't want to space the kids too far apart, also for health reasons (my pregnancy was not complication free, and subsequent pregnancies are bound to become more difficult as I age). Our concern is this: Do I need to wean the baby before the transfer? The wise google seems to think that most REs require this, but that it is not really necessary. The FET (frozen embryo transfer) would be regulated by hormones that I take, which are naturally occurring and would thus not harm the baby via milk. Of course I'll check with my RE, but I'd love to get some input first: Have any of you done a FET while still breastfeeding (if it was an RE in the Bay Area, I'd love to get the recommendation)? Have any of you thought of this, but were persuaded by the RE to wean the existing baby before? I'll appreciate any advise! Anon


Sure, it is not impossible to get pregnant via FET while breastfeeding, but why risk the reduction in success rates and why risk an abrupt end to your breastfeeding relationship? Correct,the hormones you have to take are not a contraindication for breastfeeding. BUT, taking the boatloads of estrogen necessary to build your uterine lining will significantly reduce your milk supply. Then, when you get pregnant, your estrogen levels will go sky high, your boobs will get extremely sensitive and your supply will dwindle. Breastfeeding with morning sickness is no picnic either. I say this because I got pregnant twice (naturally) while breastfeeding and miscarried both times. The first time my milk supply came back, the second time it did not. It was OK for us because my child was over 2 at the time, but it was bittersweet because we did not get a ritual to help her let go. Probably can't have it both ways


I transferred frozen embryos while breastfeeding my one-and-a-half year old. I consulted with my reproductive doc (Dr. Ryan) at Pacific Fertility in SF, and also with the lactation consultants at Kaiser Oakland, whom I really, really trust. They all gave the thumbs up, no one advised me to give up the breastfeeding. I also read up on the subject and felt assured that there were no safety issues with the hormones in the breast milk (I did all of the required hormone injections). The first two rounds of transfer failed but we got lucky with the last, and now have a beautiful, five year old boy who is healthy in every way (he has a seven year old brother, a healthy IVF baby).

By the way, I also nursed throughout the second pregnancy, even in the first three months during the injections, with support from the doc and lactation consultants. I don't believe that the first two ET rounds failed due to breastfeeding. We don't really know why they failed, except that I was taking Prednisone for RA symptoms at the time, and stopped for the transfers. The third time, my doctor advised me to keep taking my Prednisone--and it worked! We will never know, however, if the Prednisone (or lack of it) affected the outcomes. Best of luck with the transfer and the breastfeeding! Marie


Considering IVF after repeated miscarriage

August 2008

We are considering doing IVF. I have a chromosomal translocation that means 50% of my pregnancies will end in miscarriages... this far 4 of 5 have ended in miscarriage. I get pregnant crazy easily, apparently I have the follicles/ovaries of a teenager (I am almost 38), and it seems the only reason I am miscarrying is the genetic problem. I already carried one baby to term (now almost 3) Two questions.

1. The success rate percentages for 38-40 are GRIM... but it seems like I don't/won't have a lot of issues most women have (I make a lot of eggs, etc) Why does IVF fail for women?

2. There is a place in Colorado that has a 41% live birth rate for my age group. No other place in the country touches their rates. It is hard to say no to that rate. Is it worth flying out there to do this or just any IVF place with a decent live birth rate? Anon


I would seriously consider consulting with Reproductive Science Center http://www.rscbayarea.com/ regarding IVF. They at one time had the highest success rate in the area (I am not sure if this is still true). The doctors are exceptional, compassionate and truly experts. I have nothing but praise for both Dr. Wilman and Dr. Hinckley in the Orinda office. Keep in mind that the CDC data on success rates includes those with a wide range of issues and I suspect you may get a more positive prognosis in person. RSC has info. seminars fairly regularly where they pass out coupons for half priced initial consultations. Dr. Wilman helped me with my first pregnancy and hope she will help me with a second- at age 38. Best of luck to you and your family! -Erika


First off, I'm sorry you find yourselves having to tread this ugly IVF journey. Its a tough road to travel. Your post is very upbeat, but the reality of IVF is that it is an emotionally and financially grueling journey. Its been an part of our lives for the past 4 years, so we're pretty familiar with all the positives and negatives it can bring.

As an IVF 'veteran' your first question makes me nervous. IVF isn't an exact science. Not everyone comes away with a baby, even when their infertility is 'unexplained', they produce many embryos and everything goes seemingly perfectly. There are many junctions along the way where the number of decent quality embryos you produce as a couple is reduced (last time we only retrieved 8 eggs, of which 5 fertilised, of which 3 made it beyond day 2 and of which only 2 were of reasonable quality......) Quality is key with IVF, so its not the number of eggs you can/may produce that is of relavance but rather the quality of those eggs, and the unfortunate reality is that with increased age, goes reduced egg quality, hence those 'grim' stats. The reality is that sometimes (often actually) it just doesn't work, for whatever reason.....and the why is largely unknown.

Wrt your second question I would be interested to know what the patient group is like that this clinic accepts? It certainly seems like a high success rate - what do they attribute it to? Unless you are very sure your chances are better then I would at least check out PFC and/or UCSF in SF (we preferred PFC incidently). I'm sure their opinions would be worth seeking as part of your decision making process? A couple of hundred dollars for a consult will fade into insignificance once you get stuck into an IVF cycle or two.

The process of IVF is pretty intense and involves a lot of fairly unpredictable appointments once you are in the stimulation phase. You probably need to be in Colorado for a couple of weeks at least, unless you could arrange your monitoring visits here in the Bay area, and just head to Colorado for the retrieval and transfer?

I hope I don't sound too negative. We have visited both the extreme lows and the ultimate high that IVF can bring, and it truely can work miracles, but please, please, don't assume you are immune to the lows, despite your history..... Its a long long way to fall when things don't go so well. Much much luck to you on your journey, IVF vet


If you have a chromosomal issue to get pregnant, but willing to go through IVF process, there is PGD (Pre-implantation Genetic Diagnosis) to find out which embryos may carry your affected chromosome with trans location.

We did ICSI (similar to IVF) with PGD for different reason at UCSF. I was like you, at the age of 41, I had ovaries of 20's. Still, my first two ICSI failed due to the quality of embryos, but on the third trial I was successfully pregnant (with multiples. Added bonus.)

I think IVF fails, just like natural pregnancy. I heard that many natural pregnancies fail due to various and probably still unknown reasons, so this medical technology is not certainly 100% guaranteed. That being said, success does happen too. When I was trying with ICSI, my doctor told me that my pregnancy rate would be only 10%, but we tried anyway. I am glad that I did at least try. ICSI and PGD suggestor


Hi, We've been doing IVF with Reproductive Science Center of the Bay area, and we have had a good experience (plain old unexplained fertility over here!) However, I have been reading a blog called here be hippogriffs http://julia.typepad.com/ and her husband has roberstons traslocation (13 pregnancies, 2 live births).

Anyhow,it seems like you might want to look at the PGD programs really throughly--the woman at the blog I referred you to had an erroneous PGD done at Shady Grove outside of DC, and then decided to go with a clinic that was local and convenient and had a successful twin pregnancy. From my extensive blog reading, and attending Google U, I'd say you have a pretty high chance of getting pregnant, and staying pregnant, as long as the PGD is accurate. You have a sense of what the anomaly is, unlike most of us who miscarry, so the PGD is really the most important thing.

If you do decide to stay local, I highly recommend Dr Susan Willman at Reproductive Science Center in Orinda/San Ramon. She is very smart, caring and honest about the likelihood of success. I think she is also the director of PGD at RSC. Best of luck to you--M/c's are awful. Sarah


Hello: I want to recommend CCRM in Colorado . Their success rates are excellent, and I am now pregnant. One thing that they offer which might be great for you is a type of pre-genetic testing (CGH) that tests all 46 of the chromosomes on 5 day blasts, so you know that you are only transferring normal embryos. The CGH rate for pregnancy is 80% for women of all ages! You might consider doing a phone consult with one of the doctors to see what they think. The downside is that you have to go there for a one day workup and do all of their tests, even ones you may have just done at your local clinic, and of ocurse, you have to be in CO for a couple of weeks, which makes it more expensive. Still, I think it is worth it. Their lab is excellent, and I think that is the big difference, in that they are able to get more 5 days blasts, which increses outcome. If you go to IVFconnections.com and go to IVF in the USA, then Colorado, you will see many threads, including a large one about CGH. Good luck, I know how hard the process is! Anon


I want to very enthusiastically recommend the IVF program at UCSF . We had Dr. Paolo Rinaudo and he was terrific. The other docs are great too, as are all their staff. They do a really good job of informing you about all of the considerations, risks, success rates, etc at every step of the way. I think that it would be wise for you to at least speak with them or attend their information session (once a month I think?) before you decide you need to go to Colorado.

As everyone else has said, there are a variety of reasons that IVF can fail. While producing enough eggs is important, the quality and size of the eggs is also important, the timing of everything is vital, what happens whether or not embryos are created and their quality, etc. etc. We learned that the lab folks are really the most imporant staff of an IVF Center, not the docs. The lab is the place where the magic merging of egg and sperm happens and it's a very specialized skill, especially with ICSI.

A couple of things to look at with success rate statistics: age of the women in the group, whether the group includes anyone who is ''high risk'' (part of that classification is age), and incidence of multiples. Some places get lots of live births because they implant lots of embryos. But having a pregnancy with multiples is high risk as well and not something to take lightly. anon


IVF or donor sperm for low motility?

May 2004

A friend of mine is looking at the possibility of undergoing IVF. They just found out her husband's motility is very low. One option at this time is using doner sperm with the IUI procedure. Their other option is to try IVF with her husbands sperm. She is wondering if anyone has gone through with the IVF procedures and looking back at it would have chosen the doner sperm as their 1st option instead.


My husband also has low motility and we pursued IVF. We had success on our first IVF attempt, so I would recommend going with your husband's sperm vs. a donor. However, you do not state what your husband's count and motility levels are and that could affect your decision. Speak to your IVF doctor and follow your heart. Good Luck!


My husband's sperm has very low motility (due to a spinal cord injury) and we chose IVF. We do not regret our choice. We were candidates for Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection (ICSI) where they retrieve the sperm and the eggs and then inject a single sperm directly into each egg to increase the chances of fertilization. We conceived two healthy children this way (a now 6.5 year old from a fresh embryo and a now 3.5 year old from a frozen embryo). I know your friend was curious about negative IVF experiences, but I thought I would share our positive one anyway. She is welcome to contact me for more information if she wants.


Low sperm count - alternative to IVF?

Nov 2003

Well, it's finally been confirmed. The reason why my husband and I haven't gotten pregnant within the last year is because he has an extremely low sperm count. My GYN has referred us to the RSC, but we already know we can't (and honestly refuse) afford to pay that amount of money. We already have one son (conceived naturally) and feel that in spending thousands of dollars to try and have another is just taking away from him and our plans. However, we would be in awe if a miracle were to happen. So we have opted to weigh it out and give it some more time. I remember reading previous listing discussing how others had attempted alternatives to IVF or other infertily treatments. I was hoping I could get some input or referrals from people who have gone through this and made the decision to try non- traditional treatments. Anon


Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. Thankfully assuming your partner is willing there's a lot that can be done to improve sperm count. There is a daily supplement called Proxeed which is very expensive, but apparently quite effective in increasing motilty and count. Go here for more details. http://www.malefertility.co.uk/proxeed/page4.html There is also a lot to be said for acupuncture and Chinese herbs. I don't have specifics but can recommend Dr Angela Wu in SF. Best of luck, I hope this helps.


My wife and I had a similar problem, I was diagnosed with very low sperm count. We started various infertility treatments - hormones (depo testosterone) and artificial insemination, with no luck. We stopped all treatments (for a period of several months) and were considering IVF when to our surprise we conceived naturally. We also conceived our second child naturally (and unexpectedly)nearly a year after the first was born. My points are: (1) Don't give up yet. (2) Doctors'/scientists' understanding of fertility is incomplete at best. Statistically, it should have taken us ~10 years to concieve naturally (for each child) based on the measured sperm counts. anon


My husband and I are in a very similar situation. We have a 3 year old daughter and have been trying to conceive for more than a year. We finally did some tests and found out that my husband has a very low ( 8 million) sperm count, low motility and very bad morphology. I also thought that IVF was very expensive. My husband went to see an urologist who prescribed vitamin E, zinc and carnitine (Proxeed). There has been a study in the Netherlands showing that zinc + vitamin E can increase the sperm count by up to 50%. My husband tried for 3 months and his numbers went from 8 to 12 millions. Unfortunately this is still very low. The low motility is also a killer. If the numbers are low unfortunately it is very difficult to save the situation. The urologist also suggested to tie a varicocele but again this procedure is of questionable value if the numbres are very low. So for us IVF with ICSI is the only option left. Hope this helps still trying to have a second child


Check out www.onna.org for a list of vitamins and herbs as well as info for how to maximize your odds. Have you read Taking Charge of Your Fertility? A must-have and she goes into how to time intercourse when sperm count is a concern. Also www.inciid.org for their bulletin boards for their alternative therapy board, moderated by a MD who could help with ideas for male factor supplements.


When is it time to consider IVF?

January 2003

My husband and I have been trying for our second child for almost 2 years. After a miscarriage, we sought out a RE (reproductive endocrinologist) in San Francisco, Pacific Fertility Center. We have done 3 rounds of IUIs with injectible medications and they all failed. Our diagnosis is mild ovulatory dysfunction and borderline male factor. Help! Did you have success at other fertility clinics? When did you know you have to advance to IVF and was that the answer for you? Did you have insurance coverage? If yes, who? If no, how much was it and how did you afford it? Did you use alternative methods, ie acupuncture, vitamins/supplements, diet, exercise, etc. We don't have infertility coverage and would like to avoid IVF if possible. The procedure and the medications are so expensive. Any suggestions. Thank you for your help.


It seems to me that you need a Reproductive Endocrinologist that you can really work with. A good RE will answer questions about how likely you are to succeed with differing fertility techniques. (You should be comfortable enough with them that you value their advice over, say a mailing list ;-) I talked to several, and found one I liked.

I loved my RE, Dr. Susan Willman, who's in Orinda (925) 254-0444. I did try IUI's, but ended up with IVF, and now have two children. The decision to go from IUI to IVF depends on many factors, your diagnosis, but also your age, and what's important to you. The Center for Disease Control publishes the rates of IVF success by clinic, by the way. See http://www.cdc.gov/nccdphp/drh/ART00/index.htm

We paid for the IVF ourselves. None of the insurance offered us covered IVF. However, the insurance did cover many of the blood test before and medication (progesterone) after I got pregnant. If you're already using injectibles, you're already paying some of the costs of IVF. IVF Parent


I believe that it is important to pursue IVF as soon as it is feasible for you, since age factor is one thing that is always looming during infertility. You might want to have a second child, and you need the lead time.

We were lucky in that we had insurance to cover all of our attempts. My husband was employed by a company based in Massachusetts. When Dukakis was governor he mandated infertility insurance and we owe him a great debt of gratitude. There are a few other states that this is also the case for. He also worked for a California company that got infertility insurance and offered us a $25,000 cap, which paid for 2 tries.

I would join an online group called Fortility. They are incredibly knowledgeable about fertility issues and it is a great support group. You can reach them through surrogacy.org

Also, try looking into other clinics such as UCSF, Chetkowski, or other East Bay alternatives. Go for the doctor/practice that you like the best. It helps when your stress level goes up.

Dr. Wu in San Francisco is also amazing for fertility issues via acupuncture.

2 time IVF winner, 6 attempts anon


I'm sorry about your miscarriage. I too when through a number of miscarriages and many IUIs and drugs. Before you take the big (and expensive) step up to IVF I would recommend you try acupuncture and herbs. You may have already but you didn't mention it. There's a specialist in SF called Angela Wu who deals with fertility issues who has had tremendous successes. She'll get you to change your diet, take herbs and she's expensive but it worked for me and I now have a son. It won't hurt you and it can only do good.

Her phone number is (415)752-0170 and she has a website at: http://www.wushealingcenter.com/ Good luck! A very satisfied client


You don't mention your or your partner's ages, but they should be considered a factor when deciding your next options. In my case, my husband and I had been trying for more than five years, and we were both in our late 30s when we began fertility treatments.

My doctor's belief was that anything more than one year of trying without success constituted infertility. I believe the fertility clinic we had an IVF at used three years of trying as a baseline.

All our treatments were covered under Blue Cross PPO. But keep in mind that even the same carriers offer different coverage, depending on what the employer pays for. My husband's employer paid for very good benefits and covered fertility up to a set amount (I don't recall the amount); it didn't matter which type of medical fertility treatment was used. I don't know whether that included acupuncture and other alternative therapy.

My own OB/Gyn took us through six cycles of artificial insemination before he referred us to a fertility clinic in Palo Alto: Fertility Physicians of Northern California (http://www.fpnc.com/). It also has an office in San Jose. We live in the South Bay. The senior doctor there, G. David Adamson, is a pioneer in the fertility field.

Neither my doctor nor the clinic could find anything wrong with either of us, which in terms of pure statistics meant the odds were lower than other couples that we would conceive. That's because you can address a known cause of infertility. For instance, if the male partner has a low sperm count, ''cleaning'' or ''spinning'' the sperm combined with directly fertilizing the egg does wonders. Similarly, if a woman is not producing eggs, she can use donor eggs.

At the fertility clinic, we were offered the option of one cycle of artificial insemination with stronger fertility drugs (that I would inject myself) to increase my egg production or going right into in vitro. The difference was several thousand dollars in price. At this point I was 38, and it seems 37 is the magical cut-off point at which doctors tsk-tsk at you and say your odds of conceiving have plummeted. We figured that although IVF was more expensive, it would be even more costly to do another round of insemination FOLLOWED by IVF if the insemination didn't take.

So we opted for IVF. I'm happy to report that we were successful, and our son just turned 3. The funny thing is because no one could ever find anything wrong with either one of us, my doctor kept asking me about birth control, and I kept saying we were holding out hopes of having one more child. But by this time, we had exhausted our fertility coverage, and we were down to one income. So we just tried the old-fashioned way.

To put a coda on this, we're expecting our second child in March, and we did this one completely on our own. I believe a lack of stress from my being away from the working world may have a played a role. (On the other hand, I do have a toddler at home.) But go figure. Anonymous


I also went to Pacific Fertility Center in SF. We also did 3 medicated IUI's with them, and finally moved on to IVF. I think they are very conservative in that they suggest several IUI's before IVF--this is a testament to their honesty. If after several IUI's you haven't succeeded, then I think the choice is really yours (as it was ours) as to whether you want to make the financial and emotional investments that IVF requires. I have a 2 month old son thanks to IVF and the doctors at PFC. The most important thing is to trust your doctor and their advice--I was very pleased with everyone there and obviously, thrilled with the outcome.

One last comment--do consider seriously the payment options (''Plans'') they offer. We felt conflicted about our choice immediately after making it (basically one is ''insurance'', one is a one time shot, and one is a refund plan). We opted for the one time shot, but really felt as though we were gambling--not a nice feeling when you're dealing with something as unpredictable as conception... My two cents: Give it lots of thought so that you feel comfortable with your decision. Good luck to you! nina


Accupuncture & Chinese herbs regulated & shortened my cycle for the first time in my life, & I wasn't necessarily a ''believer''. Treatments can also be very soothing & relaxing. These can be expensive, but you might call Chinese medicine schools or Quan Yin in SF. Also, the idea that adoption leads to increased rates of conception due relaxing about having a baby & ''letting go'' may actually be better (or also) explained by changing hormones. I had started to miss periods for the few months before my (soon to be adopted) baby daughter moved in w/ me, but they quickly returned & became regulated, and I had clear signs of ovulaton. Research has shown hormonal changes in non-birth parents in reaction to babies. Is there a baby in your life you could bond with? (I'm sure the parents would be thrilled to have your help!).

Having said all this, you may want a 2nd opinion, especially depending on your FSH level, so as not to ''waste'' any more time-been there. I recommend Susan Wilman (RE) in Orinda.

I got a happy (different) ending, but dealing w/fertility can be so challenging. Good luck to you. Vicki


We did three IUI cycles before moving on to IVF. Unless there are identifiable reasons why the IUI's weren't working that could be addressed during future IUI's (like not enough follicles), it seems that IUI is not working for you. There is so much more control during an IVF cycle - they can really up your stim meds because there isn't the multiples risk (or as much of a risk) as with IUI. If you respond well, you may get enough embryos for more than one cycle, so the money you are putting into the stim meds goes further than with IUI. We got pregnant after our 2nd IVF. Have you talked thru IVF with your current RE team? THey should be able to help you understnad how IVF may improve your odds over IUI. Good luck!!! anon


I was in a similar situation and am so grateful I moved on to IVF. We were getting nickled and dimed doing IUI's, not to mention still spending a fortune on meds. (we did 1 clomid IUI, and 3 medicated). We did a shared risk IVF program through Dr. Susan Wilman in Orinda and got lucky the second time. We're still paying down the home equity loan, but its worth it.

If you want some onging support from very cool informed women, I recommend going to http://www.inciid.org/interinfertility.html There are two forums that could be useful: Infertilty waiting room and the IVF waiting room (see left column). These ladies saved my sanity. anon


You did not say your age, which is VERY important...2 years of trying at age 40 indicates you should run not walk to more advanced care. It sounds like you have tried the strategies pre IVF. IVF will cost about $10,000 for drugs, egg retrieval, and 1st round embryo transfer. If you have alot of good embryos, then 2nd and 3rd rounds should involve only the costs of frozen storage and embryo transfer (probably $1000). After all the failures with clomid, IUI, etc., I was happy to finally get to IVF, where I felt I had a better chance of success. We did get pregnant on the 1st round and went through UCSF (the docs have all moved on together to a new practice -don't know the name - the docs are Schriock, Givens, and Ryan). Again, if you are older, you should not waste any more time on unproven or less effective therapies. Anon


I tried for 3 years to have a baby, but was opposed to using fertility drugs. My sister in law recommended ''Eight Weeks to Optimum Health'' by Dr. Andrew Weil, as she had several miscarriages, did his program, and was able to carry her baby to term. I did this program and did also get pregnant and had a baby boy. I also had minor endometrial surgery which may have been the fix (hard to know as the doctor said that there wasn't much endometrius). I never had to try IVF, although I have two friends who did for their first child, and ended up having second children without planning them! Good luck! anon


It took me 4 years of medical intervention to get pregnant. I have Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. I spent about two years having a surgery and then using clomid and seeing bad doctors who weren't really paying attention. The second two years I was with a fantastic fertitlity specialist at Kaiser San Francisco, Dr. Seth Feigenbaum. I don't know how many cycles of Repronex injections we did but it took about two years so it was a lot. It was entirely free with my Kaiser coverage. Kaiser doesn't cover IVF so we were at the end of the line when Dr. Feigenbaum got a little more aggressive with my treatment and we have a beautiful 11 month old son now! Good luck! Danielle